the cones

Everyday No Comments »

What?! You’ve never heard of The Cones? Dude, they’re like, one of the most popular and influential grunge rock bands of the last 8 years man! Does their latest album cover jog your memory? C’mon bro, really?

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This album is a live record from their Utah tour. They had a photographer follow them around on the tour bus and on stage. Check it out! 

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Don’t freak out man, she’s not getting a fix. That’s Eleanor the leader singer. That girl’s gotta stay hydrated!

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Some of the best tracks have been created on the bus. Rowan is laying down a new hit called “Bug Bite”. 

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Ok, so the lead singer is a bit of a drama queen. The well of hydration ran out and there was no end to the agony emanating from those vocal chords…

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The band got lucky when the bus rolled in to the first stop after Eleanor hit her highest note. The stage set was complete, and Ellie was all smiles!

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Time for light and sound check. Hmm, looks like that lead singer isn’t totally drug-free. Oh, it’s just caramel popcorn. Just caramel popcorn? Have you ever had that stuff? Buzz-o-licious!

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Sound check…hey, what’s she doing to the mic?

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For rehearsal Ellie belted out a parody of “Teardrops On My Guitar” called “Dairy On My Calf”. Moo! Moo! Mooooooo!

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The show is about to get back on the road! Let’s go over the choreography one more time:

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Alright, hit it! Hit the road Jack, and don’t ya go back to McDoggles no more no more no more!

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rowan vs. eleanor

Eleanor, Rowan, Vicious Beasts No Comments »

Don’t get the wrong impression, Rowan & Eleanor are not archrivals locked in a heated, epic battle of cute vs. funny. Roastie and Ellie are constantly doing hilarious things wherever we may be. Many times they can be caught doing those charming things together. Hmm, now that I’ve written this down, it’s extremely obvious: These two girls are locked in a heated battle of cute vs. funny! The good news is everybody wins! Alright, out to the front lines!

Whoa, wait a minute! I thought this was a friendly competition!

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That’s a pretty sweet shiner you got there Ellie. Are you and Rowan really throwing punches?

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Apparently so! Alright that’s it, break it up! What’s going on here?! Don’t you give me that stone face!

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Ha! I knew you would crack under the pressure! Crack a smile that is…

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Ok, so the truth has already been told in our last post. Both Ellie and Rowan got into fights with the bathtub and the bathtub won. That’s the story we’re selling anyway…

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We took these two bruisers on another boxing adventure a couple weeks ago. So what does Ellie do while the bigs search for the letterbox? Just chill and look pretty…while sitting in the middle of the road!

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Another important activity is to stay hydrated and fed…otherwise the junior tupperware hunters start to get cranky and make obnoxious loud noises…

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Ellie knows the game you’re playin’ Rowan. No amount of kisses is going to earn you her Z-bar.

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Sometimes the hydrated and fed rule only makes the littles louder…I can even feel myself straining for this cupcake right now!

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Ellie, there’s evidence on your upper lip that you’ve had some already. You’re not hooked, are you?

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Intruder Alert! Intruder Alert! Intruder Alert! Now it’s a battle for the last cupcake!

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Better watch out Rowan, I think Ellie’s balling up her fist!

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Trying to convince her that it’s yucky Rowan? Well, she may not like blueberries, but she knows what frosting is!

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No sister rivalry after all? Aww, how nice! Caring is sharing!

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Uh-oh, Rowan scooped up the cupcake and Eleanor immediately started to tense. I don’t think Ellie cares if the wrapper is on or off, since all she wants is the frosting anyway…

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She also doesn’t want to be fed. An independent stubborn daughter of mine? Imagine that!

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Have we reached a compromise Ellie? Has this illegal cupcake immigrant been granted amnesty?

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Looks like a decision has been delayed on account of sugar-clouded judgment.

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It came to a point that Elea-sweet had to go through a 12-step program to detox from all the sugary treats she was inhaling. Rowan was there by her side for moral support. C’mon Ellie, you can do it!

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Alright! Yay for fiber…and its end result!

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How’s it taste? A little rubbery & bland? The dressing should help, but don’t loosen your grip on that banana!

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I see that this is going to take a while. The tabloids are going to lose interest in reporting on this celebrity…

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But not if she relapses! Caramel popcorn?! Say it ain’t so!

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It’s hard being almost 1½ with a hopeless addiction to sugar, isn’t it? Yeah, it looks real bad. Not cute or funny at all. Nope.

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Keeping the sticky sweetness of your outside has not proved any easier than keeping it out of your insides either!

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In case you were getting tired of sweets, Rowan wanted to share with you the familiar sounds of a private corner inside Costco…

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Daddy, did Mommy really just take a picture of Rowan on the potty? As sure as I am that Rowan has plumber’s crack, she sure did!

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It’s been a while since Cheddar made it into a blog post. He’s a nice, affectionate cat, but there’s still plenty you can do that will annoy him…

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Making him a babysitter is probably somewhere on the top of his list. The problem is that it’s hilarious!

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It’s a good thing you’re cute, because this is not hilarious. Especially when it’s the 15th time I’ve had to clean this mess up in two days!

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Are you trying to present a solution to your incessant drawer destruction? I don’t think spray glue is going to do the trick unless we glue your hands to your knees. That sounds like something a loving mother would do, don’t you think?

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Ms. Eleanor, can you please identify for the jury the person who threatened you with the spray glue?

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Ladies & Gentlemen, please direct your attention the glass where my assistant Rowan recreates the crime scene with extreme detail…

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Are you sure Ms. Eleanor? May I remind that you are under oath? Are you pointing to the reflection of the cat in the camera lens? Meowjection!

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While the jury deliberated for days, it was back to the usual routine, starting with an early morning cup of joe…

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…Chocolate joe, that is. Rowan has her own particular way of enjoying a beverage…

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Thanks, but we didn’t really need another demonstration…

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Meanwhile, the defendant kept living her flamboyant lifestyle.

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The evening came, and the jury had made a decision. Ms. Eleanor wore Polka-Dot Panda„¢ and appeared confident that the verdict would be in her favor.

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Guilty on all counts! Aggravated Physical Assault on a thread drawer, Vandalism & and Disturbing the Peace… 

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Shocked? Devastated? Just plain tired? Ok, nigh-night!

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I know that this never happens at your house, but occasionally our kids don’t always make it to bed on time. Such was the case on this particular evening. Showered, jammied, teeth brushed and ready for bed, but Rowan wouldn’t go to sleep until every hair on her head was thoroughly baked. It’s all part of her evil plot…

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This part of the plot didn’t work out as well as Rowan hoped. In an attempt to keep herself awake she stripped herself down Calvin & Hobbes style, but couldn’t quite get her jammies…off…before…yawn…zzzzzzzzzzzz…

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