auspicious autumn

Crafts, The Outdoor Woods 3 Comments »

AKA the super halloween/all things pumpkin post. Just clearing the archives…and my conscience.

Some days you’re the shoe. Some days you’re the rotten pumpkin. And some days you’re the ugly socks that only get worn once a year!

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At least he could show them off! The day we chose to go pumpkin picking was a warm, sunny, and beautiful. Is that pumpkin big enough Rowan? When you don’t have to pay per pound, you go BIG or go home!

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Hey Ellie, did you get a tasty treat as a reward for playing along? Not a bad deal, eh? I really should have cleaned her face, but this is real life people!

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Ryan made an attempt to convince the kids that pumpkins contain anti-gravity powers. The pumpkin made him jump that high…

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Looks like Daddy might be right. Or that pumpkin is doomed…

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This is Drew’s best impression of a flying chicken. Not bad!

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You’ve got to be careful getting in to the Halloween spirit; too much and it can go to your head…

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…Or to your butt. Can you say badonkadonk Ellie?

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There goes another squash-head. This was all just a plot to show off your 3.5 year old abs!

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Ah the family picture, minus Cheddar. Ha! Thanks to Mr. & Mrs. Orange Gourd that balanced the camera so we could take a timer shot!

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We’ve found the pumpkins we want to carve, so now what? Time for silly human tricks! Ellie seems to like it:

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C’mon you weakling! Ellie doesn’t seem to be as confident about this idea anymore…

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Now that’s more like it! Look at those bulging biceps!

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Oooh nice form! I think she’s holding those pumpkins up with her nose!

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Those pumpkins don’t look so confident in your strength either Rowan…As a matter of fact, they look a little green! Cheeeeeeeese.

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Girls are made of sugar & spice & everything…hey what the?! Put him in your pocket Binnie we gotta take him home and put him in the garden! Do you think the pumpkin patch will miss him?

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If pumpkins do have anti-gravity power, Ellie doesn’t want to end up in outer space.

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Brinley dear, it’s a maze…the hay bales are the walls of the maze…you’re supposed to…have fun!

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You cowpokes look pretty sharp, but I don’t think you’ve got your heads in the right holes!

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HAHAHA! Drew’s going to kill me for this, but I had kids purely for entertainment purposes…

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This little truck driver wasn’t fooled by the tricks her parents were playing…

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She made sure to check what kind of humiliating outfit she was been photographed in. Guess what you guys? We’re gonna put this on the internet for all the world to see! Nooooooooooooooo!!!

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License, registration, and proof of insurance please. Why? Because you look under-age, and those are illegal pumpkins you are trying to smuggle off this farm!

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You can run, but you can’t hide!

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Dispatch copy…I’m in hot pursuit of a blonde female, age 3, wearing Dora boots and her fly is down, over?

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Roger that. Keep an eye out for the striped-leg candy bandit!

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Don’t forget the mastermind of the operation…yeah the blonde with the horns! That’s her! Quick, yell “Ice Cream!” really loud!

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That’s all it takes to reel ’em in. Heh. Heh. Heh. Heh.

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Excellent work rookie! You have been well-trained to ignore the stringy, sticky gooey-ness in pursuit of fun.

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Speaking of things that stick…

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She doesn’t even know I took that picture. It may have to stay that way for a while!

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Hey, BuckerDrew…you all done diggin’ the brains out?

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I knew I’d find one kid who wasn’t into it. That’s ok, I think Daddy likes this part of the job anyway…

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Looks like we have some repairs to do…there are cracks popping up everywhere!

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I think Ellie knows I took that pic…look how she’s threatening me with that spoon!

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Finally, the hour has arrived! Who are you supposed to be, the Cavity Fairy?

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Hmm, I may have gone too far with that tease. Hand on hip…clenched teeth…tread lightly my friend!

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Wow, this fairy is quite beautiful…So do I get a wish or somethin?

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So flying is the common theme right? Hey Captain Drew, are you old enough to fly this airplane?

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That’s a nice candy box…I mean flight bag. Be sure to fill it to the tippy top! Mommy loves you!

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Oooh, now he’s got swagger! I like this pilot a lot!

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And just when I thought I had it figured out, an octopus landed on the sidewalk:

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She was a cute little thing, even with the tentacles. What’s that? Watch out behind me?

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Aaaahh! Jellyfish! I dunno, she looks pretty cute…does she really sting?

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No, but she does point out that the goods are now being distributed! Attagirl-fish…jelly! Huh?

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Alright! These fantastic, flying, fishy four are sure to impress. Now go get (me) some candy!

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out of bounds

Everyday, The Outdoor Woods 2 Comments »

Enough of all this growing, canning, fruity self-sufficiency! You kids go do something lame and counter-productive, that’s an order!

You know boys, they love video games. But I’ve never heard of Wii Cub Scout Pack Meeting before… 

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Looks like Eleanor’s following orders with exactness. First she horked down some Oreos, and then she went for some artificially flavored ice cream. Yum!

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Apparently Brinley can’t hold her liquor…or her water. Silly kids and their drinking games!

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Rowan can top that: She’s joined the Bloodhound Bones gang! I’ve heard that hazing involves freezing your tongue until it’s numb! Diabolical!

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Drew is on page 8 of “How To Take Over The World Without Really Trying”. Isn’t there a TV show that you could watch instead?

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Deep in enemy territory, this little soldier is planting land mines to wreak havoc and horror on this country: 

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Don’t be swayed by this girl’s bewitching good looks, or she’ll hand you that form and steal all you got while you’re examining the fine print!

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Graffiti in a state park? Shameful!

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Excuse me young man, but what are you doing climbing that tree?! You better not be trying to be a Peeping Tom!

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Don’t you shake your fist at me!

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“Look Mommy, I found a half pint.” These rascals still have canning on the brain!

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Have you heard? They’re remaking “The Dark Knight”, with evil Two-Face being played by this scary character:

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Are you ever frustrated on a nature walk when you don’t see any wildlife? We weren’t disappointed during this hike:

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Careful Brinley, scratching your back on that mossy tree can turn you into a grouchy drooling bear…

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…into a psychotic, grouchy, drooling bear! Drew, nooooo! Too late…

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